Is The Church Keeping Black Women Single? Woman Says She Was Astonished By Seeing A Thousand Single Women At One Church Event And No Man But Pastor In Sight...

A woman walked into church one evening for a singles event with a very specific spirit.

You know the one. looking to meet.... Mr. Right. Or at least other single men.

She said she had a soft smile. good outfit. slightly anointed lip gloss.

The kind of presence that says, “Lord, if he’s here, I’m open to being found.”

Because in her mind?

she was basically the last single woman left.

She says she felt like… a rare, endangered species.

A Proverbs 31 unicorn.

God’s final available daughter before He shut the dating pool down.

So imagine her surprise—no, trauma—when she walked into what was advertised as a “Singles Gathering”…

…and saw a sea of women.

Not a few.

Not a handful.

Not even a “balanced ratio.”

No.

It was giving Women’s Conference: The Sequel.

Rows.

Sections.

Overflow seating.

At this point she's scanning the room like she lost something important.

Like surely… surely the men are in the back?

Maybe they’re parking?

Maybe there’s a second room?

Maybe this is just the “women’s intercession section” before the men arrive?

Nope.

Just estrogen.

Everywhere.

The Conversation We’re Not Having (But Should Be)

Now let me shift for just a second—because beneath the humor, there’s a real conversation here.

At some point during these events the church has to have the conversation:

“What if… the issue isn’t about being the last single woman?”

What if…

There are just a lot of women in church.

A LOT.

Like… thousands.

Beautiful. Smart. Anointed.

All gathered in one place…

…with zero men.

I’m sorry, but at what point do we pause and ask questions??

If every singles event looks like this…

if every room is filled with women ready for commitment, growth, and family…

Then where are the men?

And more importantly—

what are we doing to call them in?

Because building strong families doesn’t start at the wedding.

It starts with intentional discipleship, leadership, and creating spaces where men are:

Invited

Challenged

Developed

And actually present

We can’t keep hosting “singles events” that unintentionally turn into women’s gatherings and act confused afterward.

Respectfully… the math is not mathing.

This might be a bigger conversation about:

• How churches engage men
• How masculinity and leadership are taught (or not taught)
• And whether we are truly preparing both sides for marriage and family life

Because clearly… one side is showing up.